So you know all eighteen grapes of Chateuneuf du Pape. You know your clones. You’re obsessed with your Riesling soils. You are a true SOMM. However, I, the guest, sitting in front of you with your elaborate wine bible that you duly created to match every ingredient in the kitchen, do I really care?

All I want from you is to make my night truly special. Don’t make me feel like a jerk, don’t try to teach me unless I really want to, don’t judge me if I insist on drinking that bottle that will pair terribly. Be kind and guide me, but most of all: tell me a good story. Show me your passion and sparkle my imagination. What I really want is be “wooed” and “wowed” to drink that awesome wine that you picked, because there’s an amazing winegrower, a former lover, a good friend, a poem, some crazy hardship or a funny anecdote that comes along with it. Yes your geeky guest will love to hear about all the clones and soils, and please be there to please him (it’s usually a guy for some reason). For the rest of us, remind yourself that a good sommelier is just a great storyteller. Your next audience is waiting for you on table 24. Roll up the curtains!